Says them...

"They", whoever they may be, say a lot of things (I might have mentioned it before). Today, I'd like to pore over one of them.

So, and possibly inspired by the grim news du jour (it's been a pretty grim weekend...), "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger". This sounds well enough, but how well does this work? I'm thinking back about as far as two years. I see three things that did not kill me. Well, I see plenty of things that did not kill me, but if we were to cinsider all these things, we'd live in a beritable bubble of fear (and, having been there for a very brief period - and worse still, having seen the effects of such practive over a long period - it's not something you'd like). So, berakdown time:

A) My hernia: It's been almost two years since I had my first sciatic pain crisis from that hernia I had removed two years ago come February. I still get the occasional pangs along eiter brach of my sciatic nerve from time to time, but nothing worrisome, usually explainable by something as casual as bad posture, and nothing I shouldn't expect, right? So I lived through that, and now, whenever I slip, even if I manage to regain my footing or even if I don't lose my footing at all, I get scared halfway to death. So two slips on the same day could be the death of me (not really, right? Right, you guys?). How is that stronger than when I was at almost my ideal weight, strong as an ox and laughing at these minor adversities?

B) Colleges and Conflicts: It's not really possible to work for an extended period of time with anyone and not disagree on at least some minor, unimportant thing, is it? Often enough, a big fight arises within a short preiod, and that's what happened, about a year ago, give or take. Long story short, I was accused of slacking off, my work was said to be deemed "unusable", yet used and credit for it taken from me, I was threatened in more ways than I care to remeber and it all ended well... with me absolutely never being any warmer than "cordial" to at least one person ever again. So, did I slack off? Well, I might have... a little... I'm fairly sure I did, I'm not one to deny my shortcomings (not all of them, at least), and that's a fact, but here's a few more facts: I wasn't blatatly ripping off others' work, like some colleagues were doing and inciting me to do; I was awaiting feedback from the rest of my group, and got only accusations in turn; I was more aware of the deadline than them, even though they accused me of the contrary; and finally, fuck you, I was the best damn coder of the whole bloody group, that's my story and I'm sticking to it. So I rushed headlong into this with previous, similar experiences, which led me to repeating the phrase, "I just don't learn." I wonder if I'm stronger for it.

C) Family Falling-outs: You might remeber last year's last entry. Well, there's a no-brainer; this one definitely made me stronger. I got my cat, as promised, and we're quite happpy together; she, as the cute, warm and fuzzy lovely pet, and me, as the fat bloke who feeds her, pets her, cuddles with her, shelters her and provides for her needs. At least this much worked out great.

So does it all make us stronger? I, for one, know of people who have, in fact, been made incredably strong for what has nearly killed them, and other who have been very much left for dead, and weaker for the whole ordeal. Perhaps "they" would like to choose their words a bit more carefully. Fat chance!

Pax vobiscum atque vale.

ArabianShark has some brand new speakers to replace two of his old speakers in his kick-arse 5.1 surround speakers. Guess one of the old ones was not made stronger by what didn't kill it, and the other lacked some measure of restraint... and got itself killed.

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